We finished our show in Asheville the other night and drove straight home from the gig. 16 hours of final finality in the van and then we pulled up to our driveway for the first time since September.
Chilly, rainy day in Lawrence, MA today. Head is groggy from the road. It’s hard to know what to do with yourself when you get home. You know you should rest but six straight weeks at 80 miles per hour tells you other wise. So you want to move, but your body just can’t. You want to maybe think, read, create, but your brain won’t budge. Everything’s fuzzy. The lights seem dim.
Not knowing anything else, I played more of the little word game (Scramble 2) on my phone that got me through all those van hours. I checked Twitter and Facebook a bunch, just like I did during all those van hours. I watched YouTube. Skate videos mostly, but eventually music. Django Reinhardt, Stochelo Rosenberg, Brian Setzer. And dug out this classic that perfectly suits my mood at the moment (thanks to Andrea for pointing me to the original version):
Also I put on The Barr Brothers CD earlier and was amazed by it.
In the last 45 days we did 35 cities in 25 states. A few shows were lightly attended but most were not. Mostly, we had some very good nights full of hardcores from all over the country singing back the words I wrote. People drove from hours away to get to the shows or used the shows as an excuse to make trips to see old friends. There was strength out there, there were stories of people being truly affected by the music. Amazing.
One man in Seattle wandered backstage after the show and told me my music saved his life. Later, his wife would email me saying that this was, in fact true. He had gone through a period where he had grown more and more dark, more detached from his loved ones, eventually contemplating suicide. Something about hearing “75 and Sunny” for the first time at one of the Martin shows this past spring just lit some kind of light back up in him. Right then and there he started turning things around.
It’s still amazing to me as I type this out. I think about the woman who named her baby “Patience Friday” or the stories about all kinds of children singing the words to “Eggs.” Ever see this one?
I’m not sure why I bring all this up now. I’m just thinking about it all as I sit here in my room for the first time in a while.
Guitar case sits by the door. The van and trailer are parked in the drizzle outside. Mail still sits in an enormous stack on the floor that I will put off for as long as possible. My banjo sits on the unmade bed along with my camera case and a dirty shirt that I will surely continue to wear.
What did we just do out there? Bringing up these stories is an extreme way of reminding me.
It’s sort of a weird platform for me to write this, but I’ll say it again: I just want to get the art better.
(This is a weird platform because if you’re reading this, you’re likely a fan of the music I’ve already made. You’re the only people in the world who might not want or expect better. You’re the only people in the world who are ok with what I’ve already done. But I digress…)
There are many more shows to play to close out this year, including a run with JJ Grey and Mofro starting next week, a bunch of our own dates through December, and New Year’s in Foxboro, MA. These should all be a blast. On our best nights now, I feel like the band has reached a nice place of looseness and tightness all at once.
And in January, when the real decompression starts to take place, much more than will this week, then I hope to buckle down and start creating in earnest. I just want to get the art better. I want to get it better and I believe that I can. And it seems that a fair amount of people are listening now.
So I’ve got that going for me. Which is nice.

thanks for keep keepin on Ryan…..many of us need your music, for as long as you can bring it to us…
thank you for your hard work, and making the art better. i love art!!!
By: MarcyD. on November 9, 2010
at 1:01 pm
That story of the Seattle man brought tears to my eyes… you are a gift to this world. Don’t put TOO much pressure on yourself, you will ‘art’ better because it is in your composition as a masterpiece in progress. You’re following your path, that’s all we can do. You are so lucky to have found it and a way to live it to the fullest. LOVELOVE.
By: Jaepeaus on November 9, 2010
at 1:08 pm
Your the Man!!!
By: Eric on November 9, 2010
at 6:45 pm
Dan and I love you
By: Taraleigh Weathers on November 9, 2010
at 9:38 pm
good job…enjoy your down time…recharge…
DO IT AGAIN!
p
By: pappy on November 9, 2010
at 10:27 pm
Just to be clear, i expect more much more from you and I am not satisfied with what you have done so far! WHen I see Martin open for you, then I will be satisfied! lol See ya in November!
By: brian Drourr on November 9, 2010
at 11:15 pm
Welcome home to you and the band. I was a part of the crowd at HumBrews in Arcata- my third time seeing you all at that venue and each time I have been priveliged to watch the evolution of a very creative team.
Music is your soul. That is so very obvious to all of us who are touched by your words. Your determination to stretch your art is why we linger. It pulls us all closer to you as you show us our reflection, so honestly captured in the verse and in the beat.
It is the love, pure and simple, that we hear and treasure. It is the love that we return to you.
By: Susan John on November 10, 2010
at 12:35 am
I always love reading your blog…….it gives us a little bit of insight into what you are about…..but listening to your music is the best….Glad you are all home safe and sound, rest up and enjoy….
Thank you for putting Sleepwalk on, I was 14 when that came out and I can see the couples on American Bandstand dancing to it and me dreaming I was one of them…What a memory.
Thanks Brian, hope to see you soon…
Dale
By: Dale Milanese on November 10, 2010
at 12:54 am
So, you and your music are kind of the only things that make me smile nowadays. Through your music, you hand me reason after reason to keep on living and loving and smiling, and I can’t thank you enough for that. You’re my hero and my inspiration, and I just wanted to let you know how much you and your work mean to me.
By: Jamie on November 17, 2010
at 11:47 am
Keep bringing it!
By: Anonymous on December 8, 2010
at 8:03 pm
hey ryan Patience is getting so big. email me if you guys want to see pics!
By: dan on February 28, 2011
at 7:14 am